“We should not see ourselves as the contestant but as the prize… The energy in which we go into a relationship is usually what we get out of it. So if we go in quite hastily or not being ourselves or balanced, we will have to deal with that at some point in the relationship as it sets the tone for the whole relationship.”
Being immersed in the matchmaker industry made me wonder, just as we would take the time and preparation in finding and getting the perfect job, and maybe even get professional help like an agent, coach, or mentor, why would we treat our love life any less professionally?!
By taking a course in matchmaking, attending Matchmaker conferences talking to different matchmakers and coaches, and reading books on the psychology of relationships, I felt so much more enlightened on love and relationships, to understand what happened in my past love life dramas to give me a new perspective on how to approach dating in the future!
There is so much to learn about Love, from both a psychological, practical and spiritual perspective that we sometimes just don’t know or just isn’t talked about enough to inform us for better, happier relationships and dating choices.
We can become so emotionally invested so quickly whilst dating, we can’t see, think or act straight to match-make for ourselves effectively meaning our love lives aren’t treated with the importance and significance they have!
I want to encourage you to become the Expert to your love life, and treat it with the important price tag it has! Get to know yourself, and experience and experiment to the fullest when you’re single and dating. As cheesy/simple as it sounds, my mum always insisted to me from a young age, “you would take time shoe shopping to find the perfect shoes, so treat dating and finding the perfect guy exactly the same!” If you’re like me and LOVE shoes, and take shoe shopping seriously then, just as you would take time trying different pairs on, and maybe even shop around, to make sure that you LOVED them, couldn’t live without them, and you were making the right decision in buying them, treat your love life exactly the same!
Sometimes we too easily just settle for and accept what comes to us, and what’s available to us, we don’t truly focus on whether this is really what we want, we don’t ask ourselves how do we really feel with this person. Just because they’re there giving us the attention we want, we end up just accepting them and settling for something that just isn’t truly, deeply really what we want!
Empower and educate yourself on love and relationships, whether it is reading a book or talking to someone who genuinely understands the psychology of relationships. Give yourself time to get to know someone and get to know what you want in a relationship. Give yourself the emotional space to make the best decisions for yourself by taking your emotions out of dating until you’re in a committed relationship!